turn, turn, turn

I'm aware that thinking of life as seasonal is not new. In fact, as the title to my entry illustrates, there are songs, entire bands, and even a chain of hotels reflecting this theme (I wish I could give the reader some sort of discount on any of these...alas, this blog is completely non-sponsored. and I'm not sure discounts exist on retired bands). The idea is often sought to help explain change...in weather and moods alike. It could be the metaphor for change. And one thing is certain: therapists love metaphors. In fact, if I (or my client) am able to design one during a session, I'd consider the session to be a success. It's pretty liberating to be able to creatively compare the mess that you're feeling to something more concrete or formal. And, when I was practicing, I was definitely partial to using the season metaphor with clients.

In past entries, I've noted various therapeutic techniques that might seem like "cop-outs"--you know, easy things a therapist can say avoid thinking or listening too hard...not that we ever do that. But I'm here to tell you that while these techniques might be common, they are not cop-outs. They are common for a reason--just like pop songs are popular for a reason...they're catchy.
The concept of seasons is hard to avoid, especially since we and the world are constantly changing. There's a reason for seasons. And a reason to talk about seasons, I venture to say. Thinking about our time on earth in seasons may help us make sense of our lives as a whole. Just as, I imagine, mother nature uses them to makes sense of herself. Here, I'll talk about how I'm using it to make sense of my own life. I can do that because you're not my client.

Anyway, I'm currently not practicing therapy. I'm "in between jobs" as they say. It has been an interesting year for me, having uprooted myself from Philadelphia and moved to L.A. And then having turned right back around to Ohio after only 6 months. While an event in my life initiated this latter move (the former move was...just a move), I find myself feeling lost...again. It's becoming a common feeling for me. Part of me really wanted to move back to Ohio and be with my family. Another part wanted to stay in L.A. to see where the four jobs I had acquired would take me. Deciding one way or the other did (and never does) appeal to me. I want it all...at one time. Because I think that if I have it all, I won't be lost. But we all know that can never happen on this earth. I just can't seem to convince the disappointment center of my brain of that fact. So, I'm trying to re-train myself to see my life in seasons, where I can re-experience different parts of my life in a new way...if I want. When I get a chance to "revisit", everything could be different than I imagined. Unlike earth's seasons, our seasons may not look so uniform. For example, right now. I moved home to help out my parents, and naturally, I moved in with them. Although I've caught myself reverting back to 14-year-old Emily, my experience in this season of life is way different than my last season here. And thank God. I have to remind myself that revisiting isn't necessarily going back in time. Rather, it's a chance to move forward and hope for new life. Kind of like the real Spring.

Since I moved from L.A., I've told myself (and others whom I miss dearly) that I could return at some point. Who knows? There's a lot I had yet experienced there. Even though I might want to just pick up where I left off, it won't be the same. But that might not be a bad thing. When I think about it, even earth's seasons haven't been the same each year. I remember one 80 degree New Year's Eve in Philadelphia. True, that can be a little unnerving (scary global warming!). But it's also a little exciting. We might think that each season will be the same as the last, but we never know what a new (or old) one might bring.

"To Everything (Turn, Turn, Turn)
There is a season (Turn, Turn, Turn)
And a time to every purpose, under Heaven."